How do I know I am not an Esau?

Roman 9:13 contains the statement:

As it is written, “Jacob I loved, but Esau I hated.”  (ESV)

This verse comes in a discussion of election. 

According to Romans 9 in the verses immediately following this, not all Abraham’s physical descendants are recipients of God’s promises to Abraham.  God promised Abraham that through his seed all the nations on earth would be blessed.  However, the promise did not pass to Ishmael, only to Isaac.  Then Isaac had twins, Esau and Jacob.  But, the promise did not pass to both, only to Jacob.  God’s “hatred” of Esau was not an active despising.  Rather, God passed over Esau in favor of his brother Jacob.

While we do not understand why or how, this is how grace works.

The Bible ends with this invitation from God:

The Spirit and the bride say, "Come."  Let anyone who hears this say, "Come."  Let anyone who is thirsty come.  Let anyone who desires drink freely from the water of life.  (Revelation 22:17, NLT)

Although the invitation is open to all and Jesus died for the sins of the whole world, not everyone will be saved.  Jesus actually says:

"Not everyone who calls out to me, 'Lord!  Lord!' will enter the Kingdom of Heaven.  Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter.”  (Matthew 7:21, NLT

According to John 3:36:

And anyone who believes in God's Son has eternal life.  Anyone who doesn't obey the Son will never experience eternal life but remains under God's angry judgment.  (NLT)

God is absolutely sovereign.  In other words, He does what He pleases.  He could save every person.  However, He does not.  He allows those who choose not to believe the freedom to choose not to believe.  Since God could overpower their will and force them to believe, in that sense God passes over such people.  He allows them to go their own way.  This happened to Ishmael and it happened to Esau.

According to Ephesians 2:1, “Once you were dead because of your disobedience and your many sins.”  (NLT)  This is true of all of us, of every human being on the planet.  Because of this truth, the saying of Jesus in John chapter six is also true.  He says, “For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me…”  (John 6:44, NLT)  There is a mystery in this that we cannot understand.  In John 3, Jesus explains the working of the Holy Spirit in a person being born again and says:

“The wind blows wherever it wants.  Just as you can hear the wind but can’t tell where it comes from or where it is going, so you can’t explain how people are born of the Spirit.”  (John 3:8, NLT)

We are told that God chooses some and passes over others (Romans 9). 

The way we know we are one of the chosen is based on God’s word and the Holy Spirit’s work in our lives. 

First, we know we are saved because of God’s word.  John 3:16 tells us that whoever believes will not perish.  Romans 10:13 tells us that whoever calls on the Name of the Lord will be saved.  These promises are from God.  Therefore, we trust them completely.  There is no reason to doubt that you are saved if you are trusting in these promises. 

In fact, the Holy Spirit confirms we are saved.  Romans 8:16 says, “For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God's children.”  (NLT)

If you have believed on the Lord Jesus Christ for your salvation, then you are not an Esau.